I’m Not Just Here For The Food

Hi, I’m Barry Fig. It’s been a wonderful New Years and I’ve had a great time.  Even though they forced me to wear this outfit.
I just wanted to say a few words, dudes. I used to be a human being too. But somewhere along the way while I was trying to make the world’s biggest [...]

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Why I Could Never Be a Locavore in One Word: Bubblegum

To be a locavore, it’s possible that I might be able to give up tomatoes out of season.
Bananas, yes. Of course.
And really who seriously cares about kiwis?
But bubblegum is another matter. I do not believe that ‘gum base’ grows in my area.
If it did, I could be locavore. I could make my own bubble gum.
Then [...]

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School Cafeteria Food is Not Why Kids Can’t Read

Although there is some fuss going on in the cultured foodie-segments of society about the terrors of the food served in our public school cafeterias, it is a fact that Dreadful School Cafeteria Food is not why kids can’t read.
True, the fact must be faced that it is (barely) possible that some children – when [...]

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What’s That Got to Do with the Price of Lobsters in Maine?

“Just got back from dinner out”, my uncle said on the telephone. “Lobster again. Everyone’s selling it so cheap. Huge lobster dinners for less than ten dollars. Lobster’s going downhill. Less than four dollars a pound.”
My uncle lives in Maine. The price of lobsters in Maine (like the price of tea in China) may or [...]

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Foodie This That and the Other Thing Redux

In this article about a (mute) swan that I found in a rubbish free paper that someone had left on a rain sodden table outside a Manchester bar, the interviewee claims to hear the sound of quacking outside. However, swans don’t quack on account they are swans and not ducks so someone is lying and [...]

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Food History, Politics, and Hunger: Doin’ the Hokey Pokey

You put your left foot in
You put your right foot out
You put your left foot in
And you shake it all about
You grab yourself a partner and you turn yourself about
That’s what it’s all about!
Anybody remember the hokey-pokey dance? Always fun, even the confusing parts that should not have been but were, in the silly way [...]

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